


A Cruel Twist of Fate

by Henry_Sturges_to_Henry_Lincoln



Category: The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: Dystopia, Immune Thomas, Infected Newt, M/M, Post-Apocalypse, Sad Ending, Star-crossed, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-25
Updated: 2017-09-30
Packaged: 2019-01-05 06:16:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12184539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Henry_Sturges_to_Henry_Lincoln/pseuds/Henry_Sturges_to_Henry_Lincoln
Summary: After the Flare took hold of the population, not even WICKED could get it back under control.The virus spread fast and any form of government and civilization crumbled away with the majority of the world's population's sanity. Some are immune to the virus, like Thomas and his group of survivors. They scavenge and are always moving, doing anything to survive in a world determined to kill them.One day, Thomas' group stumbles upon a group of Cranks. Usually, they let them be, or put them out of their misery if they're too far past the Gone, but this time it's different. This time, there's one so sane Thomas can't bear to just leave him with the other Cranks. In Thomas' attempts to keep an eye out for the boy's safety, he finds himself caring more than he should. And the boy is just as inexplicably drawn to Thomas. They grow close, too close, despite knowing only one of them is Immune, and the other's life is doomed to end. Because, by some cruel twist of fate, they fell for each other.///AU where, as the summary says, even WICKED fell apart after the Flare took hold of the population, and spread way too fast to be controlled. Sort of a post-apocalyptic sort of deal! (It's gonna be sad, you've been warned)





	1. Heroism and its Drawbacks

**Author's Note:**

> Hello lovelies! 
> 
> I'm not sure where I got this idea from, or why I like to torture myself and others with these sad ideas, but oh well, here it is! My newest, most depressing work!! 
> 
> ***I do NOT own the Maze Runner series or any of the characters!***

"You ready?" 

Thomas snapped out of his day-dreaming, looking over his shoulder where Minho stood, hands on his hips. Thomas stretched; the rifle strapped over his shoulder always made him feel cramped. "Yeah."

They walked through their camp quietly, careful not to wake anybody. It was barely past dawn after all, people needed sleep. Especially since they planned on moving this camp in a couple days, anyways. That was how they lasted so long; constantly moving. 

And being Immune didn't hurt, either. The only people left nowadays were the Immune and the Cranks. Everyone was either sick, or couldn't get sick. Thomas and his group were lucky people; they were Immune, finding each other along the way. Now their camp had grown to about thirty people, and they were making it in this world somehow. 

They trekked out into the damaged city as the sun began to rise higher. They popped in and out of a few stores that looked like they had been gutted like some poor animal, finding an actually decent amount of supplies. Some cans of food, a few bottles of useful medicine in the pharmacies and water, and a couple blankets. 

Minho peeked into his backpack, nodding in approval. "Should we go out a bit farther or just head back?" 

Thomas looked around, it didn't seem like many more of the other stores would be worth it. The deeper into the city, the more stripped and bare it looked. "I don't know, maybe we should head back." 

Minho nodded in agreement. "Sounds good to me. I could use some crappy canned fruit and a nap." 

Thomas laughed; that sounded surprisingly good. "Don't forget a drink from a bottle of water that tastes suspiciously like plastic." 

"And a blanket that reeks of dust and mildew," Minho added with a nod. "Good stuff." 

As they headed back, Thomas heard something off in the distance. It sounded something like people arguing. Perhaps playing. Either way, Thomas couldn't help but think maybe he should investigate. "Ya hear that?" 

Minho groaned. "Do we have company?" 

"I don't think so," Thomas said, jogging over to an abandoned semi truck, climbing the rusted ladder on the side. When he reached the top, he brushed himself off and looked around. 

Minho came crawling up the ladder, hopping up beside him. "Come on Thomas, I think you're losing your mind."

Thomas listened for a moment, then looked off behind him where he was pretty sure the sound was coming from. Just as he was sure all he was doing staring at buildings first thing in the morning like a lunatic, he saw a flash of movement from behind one of the buildings. "Over there," he said, hopping down off the truck, landing very ungracefully. Borderline painfully. 

Minho followed, almost falling as he landed. "Christ, Thomas, can we go?" he spat, starting to look genuinely annoyed. "I got the backpack full of the cans, it's a bit heavy over here." 

Thomas rolled his eyes. "Then stay here while  _I_ go look," he said, rushing ahead. 

Of course, Minho followed. 

They peered around the corner of the building where Thomas had seen the flash of movement. And just as he had suspected, there were people there. A couple of Cranks laughing and snickering as they shoved around some boy. Usually, Thomas would've just figured it was some Cranks messing around with each other, and would've gone his own way. But the boy they were jostling around didn't look like a Crank--at all. 

He was thin, and looked like he had least put some effort into keeping himself clean. There wasn't a trace of lunacy in his eyes. The only thing that may have pointed to him being a Crank was the way he didn't even seem annoyed by these Cranks bothering him, he looked used to it.

Thomas glanced at Minho, who just huffed. "You're gonna go rescue him, aren't you?" 

Thomas just grabbed his rifle sling, pulling it off him and holding the gun in his hands. He shrugged. "What can I say, I'm heroic." 

Minho crossed his arms. "I'm staying here, and I'm not gonna save your sorry butt when you screw this up." 

"Yeah, yeah," Thomas said. He pulled in a deep breath, then raised his rifle and walked out. 

It didn't take them long to notice Thomas coming; he imagined he was hard to miss, stalking forward, holding a rifle pointed at them. The Cranks began backing up, the boy they were harassing began backing up with them. "No," Thomas said, nodding at him. "You come with me," he said, offering a smile, trying not to scare him. 

He ran his slender fingers through his fluffy, somewhat chaotic blond hair, glancing between the Cranks on other side of him, then slowly started forward. Thomas began backing up, and the boy was smart enough to follow. And the Cranks were smart enough not to. 

As they returned back to the side of the building, Thomas notice the Cranks run off in the opposite direction. He sighed in relief, lowering the gun and looking at the boy. "Are you okay?" 

The boy just looked between Minho and Thomas warily. Minho looked at Thomas, crossing his arms. "He thinks we're gonna murder him or something." 

Thomas frowned, suddenly feeling really bad. "What, really? No, I just thought you needed some help, those Cranks looked like they were giving you a hard time." 

The boy just shook his head. "I was fine." 

Thomas wasn't sure what he had expected, but he felt a bit stumped now. "Um. Well, yeah, I'm sure you could've taken care of yourself, but I just thought-" 

"Look," the boy said, softening. "You seem like nice people, so I'm going to have to suggest you leave now, and let me go." 

Thomas panicked slightly. "You don't think I was kidnapping you, do you?! I wouldn't--" 

"Hang on," Minho said, cutting Thomas off. "Why should we get going?" 

"Just trust me." the boy said, peering around the corner of the building, then looking back at them. "It's not going to end well for you if you stay." 

Of course, Minho was just as hotheaded as ever. He took a jarring step forwards toward the boy, getting in close to his face. "Is that a  _threat?"_

Thomas had expected the boy to back down, but he just crossed his arms and glared right back at him.  _"No,_ it's a bloody warning. And I suggest you take it." 

Thomas grabbed the back of Minho's shirt and yanked him back. "Stop being an asshole." Thomas snapped, then looked at the boy. "What do you mean?" even as he asked it, he caught rushes of movement overhead on the tops of the buildings. 

Thomas recoiled slightly when a person appeared on one of the tops of the buildings, staring down at them, pointing a jagged knife down at them. "I suggest dropping the guns and taking a step back, hermanos." 

Minho was about to argue when three more people appeared around him. Then three more on the ground, just to their left, stalking down the alley towards them, all of them holding some kind of nasty weapon. Then four more on their left, two of them were the same Cranks Thomas had just held at gunpoint. 

Thomas and Minho exchanged glances, then shed off their guns and knives, dropping them on the ground. Obediently, they took a step back away from the boy. The boy just looked at them, almost apologetically.

He sighed. "I tried to warn you," he said regrettably. "I'm with them." 


	2. Two Empty Cans of Peaches

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've got a little extra time before bed, so I figured I'd update this one again! I think this entire work is gonna have about nine chapters in all, maybe ten, who knows! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!  
> ***I do NOT own the Maze Runner series or any of the characters!***

 

Thomas sighed deeply. He had gotten them into some trouble. 

"Thomas," Minho snapped as the Cranks began sliding down drain pipes and hopping off fire escapes until they landed on the ground, all of them landing with scary grace. "I am never, ever, going scavenging with you again." 

And as they drew in closer, crooked weapons pointed on them, Thomas just frowned deeply. "I don't think we're gonna be doing much scavenging anymore." 

The man who had spoke the first time stepped forward. He was young, maybe mid-twenties. He stood before them, close, not afraid of Thomas or Minho shooting out and attacking him. Which was warranted, considering he had Cranks all around who would protect him if he did. "Hmm. I considered just killing you," he started, looking over Minho and Thomas slowly, inspecting them. "Because I gotta tell ya, it looks _pretty bad_ when you hold my people at gunpoint and try to kidnap Newt"--Thomas didn't know why, but he made a mental note; the boy he tried to rescue was named Newt--"but then I noticed the backpacks. And something tells me you've got a camp nearby." 

Thomas' heart sunk. This was getting bad. 

"So what?" Minho spat, getting right back in the man's face. If he wasn't scared of getting himself killed, Thomas would've reached over and smacked Minho right in the face. 

" _So_ , I wonder how many supplies your friends will give up if we offer you in return," he said with a sneer. 

Thomas and Minho just exchanged wary glances. The man simply turned away from them like they were peasants. "Let's take 'em back, tie 'em up. We wanna let their group stew in worry for a bit before we go after 'em. We'll leave for their camp first thing tomorrow morning." 

The Cranks laughed and sneered and did as told. Thomas just looked at Newt, who just frowned apologetically. 

 

"Thomas." 

"Yeah?" 

"All I wanted was a nap, ya know that?" Minho complained. He briefly struggled against the ropes around his arms and ankles. Then just sighed in defeat. "It's all I wanted." 

"I'm sorry," Thomas said for the thousandth time. "I thought..." 

"I know what you thought," Minho said, not sounding particularly upset or pleased. "I guess your heart was in the right place or whatever." 

Thomas looked around, sighing at their situation. These Cranks lived in some sort of hotel, well, what used to be a hotel. On the way up, Thomas noticed many of the walls were missing, the rooms were in poor condition, and on the stairs on their way up, Thomas had to hop over spaces where stairs had once been but weren't anymore. They sat in a small, attic-like room. There were little holes all over the ceiling probably just from being weighed down by the rain and dried out by the sun, and one large one from God-knows-what; the sun eagerly flooding through, lighting up the specks of dust floating lightly on the air. 

If it wasn't for that, it would've been completely dark. No windows, and only one shut door. 

"I gotta pee," Minho groaned, struggling once again. "I'm hungry. I'm tired." 

"Well, better get used to holding, being hungry, and being tired, because they're not taking us back until tomorrow, remember?" Thomas said, trying to find a comfortable position. It was a bit hard to do with his arms and legs bound. 

"Thomas," Minho said, glaring at him. 

"Let me guess..." Thomas replied with a roll of his eyes. 

"I just wanted a nap." 

They had said it in perfect unison. 

 

It felt like days, but eventually the sun set, and night hung overhead. 

Someone had come by to let them eat and drink briefly, and use the bathroom. Other than that, they had just been sitting up there for hours. Thomas was sure it was at least midnight when he heard quiet footsteps outside. They were uneven, and a thought crossed his mind.  _Newt had a limp, didn't he?_

To answer his question, Newt quietly crept inside, a knife in hand.

Minho glared. "Great, you." he spat. 

"Shh!" Newt hissed, closing the door quietly. 

"Why? So you can kill me quietly? I'll start yelling," Minho replied, taking in a deep breath. 

"I'm going to help you now will you bloody _shut up!"_  Newt snapped. 

Minho looked a bit baffled, but he did stop. 

Newt rushed over, and in what Thomas took as an insult directed at Minho, Newt began to cut the ropes off Thomas first. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry you got mixed up in this, and I'm sorry about them. They're minds aren't as... stable as they used to be. But they're really not bad people. They weren't, anyway." 

Thomas just watched him cut the ropes, fascinated by him. The moonlight struck his big, brown eyes brilliantly so. When Thomas was free, he stretched, more than thankful. Even Minho's features softened as Newt cut him free. "Thanks," Minho muttered, and that was the closest to an apology Newt was going to get. 

"I'm Thomas." Thomas blurted.  _Of all the things to say..._

"Newt," he said with a pensive nod. 

"I'm Minho. Great, now we're all best friends," he said, getting to his feet. "Let's get out of here, Thomas." 

Newt stood, pocketing his knife. "Follow me, and be quiet." 

They obeyed, trying to match his silent footsteps. Even with a limp, Newt was much lighter on his feet than them. They turned off into a room that was only about one story down from the attic. There, on the bed, sat their guns and backpacks. Still full of their supplies. 

"No way," Minho muttered under his breath. 

Newt just shrugged smugly. "Figured you might want those," he said, rushing to the window. He crawled out onto a fire escape. 

Minho and Thomas grabbed their things and followed him out. Thomas was struck with a sudden rush of vertigo and had to grip the wall beside him; nine stories up was dizzying. Newt put his hand on Thomas' arm. "Don't throw up here, if you do they'll know I was the one who got you guys out."

Thomas couldn't tell if it was a joke or not. 

Minho turned to Newt and nodded. "Seriously, thanks." 

Newt nodded. "They're really not bad people." he paused. "Well they didn't used to be..." 

Thomas cast a longingly glance at Newt. "Come with us." 

Newt recoiled. "What?" 

"Yeah, what?" Minho snapped, warning laced in his voice. 

"Well, you're not like them. Are you even infected?" Thomas asked, his confidence draining. 

Newt smiled a bit, amused. "Trust me, Tommy, I'm infected." he shook his head. "I can't go with you. But you need to go." 

"Then just come back with me to get some food?" Thomas offered quickly. "You guys don't look too good, you least of all." 

Newt cast a worried glance at the building, then looked at Thomas bashfully. "Can I?" 

Thomas smiled, a warmth spreading through him. "Of course, let's go!" 

Minho gave him a dirty look, but didn't argue. He just started down. There were ladders that hung from each fire escape, and when at the bottom of those, it was easy to jump down to the next. But the way the thin wire, cage-like contraptions wiggled and clattered when they hopped on to each one was enough to make Thomas feel sick. 

Eventually, they made it to solid ground, and Thomas kind of felt like throwing up, and kind of felt like kissing the ground. He did neither though, as they started heading back to the camp. 

Dawn was just barely beginning to lighten the skies when they got back. The camp was in sight when Minho suddenly whirled around. "You two wait here," he said, leaving no room for question. "No offense, but I can't be bringing a Crank in with my people." he said sternly, almost harshly. 

"None taken," Newt muttered, but the tone of his voice suggested otherwise. 

Thomas nodded towards a shallow, small stream just a couple dozen feet away. "It's not much to look at anymore, only a tiny bit of water, but it might be a nice place to sit and eat." 

Newt just smiled a little and nodded. 

When Minho came back with their food, he quickly left them again, but not before reminding Thomas to shoot if Newt tried anything. Thomas just rolled his eyes and led he and Newt over to the little stream. 

Newt sat down, peeking down at it. "Yeah, it is kinda pathetic." 

"No kidding," Thomas said, handing him a can of peaches. 

"Really makes ya think what they put in these to make them last," Newt said, taking a bite. He practically melted after just one bite. "Mm, I take it back, I don't care." 

Thomas laughed, digging in to his own, feeling absolutely starving. "How long has it been since you've eaten?" 

"Um," Newt stared at the food thoughtfully for a moment. "Four days, I think." 

Thomas physically flinched, as if he had been hit. "Christ," he muttered, realizing he didn't even know what  _absolutely starving_ was. "There's supplies still in the city, isn't there?"

"I would imagine so," Newt said, sighing. "But most of the people I run with are pretty far Gone, or getting there. They either say it's too dangerous, or when we do go scavenge, it's usually gone before they get back. Then assuming something makes it back, it's never enough for everybody so... And they don't let me go anywhere with them. They think I'm a baby or somethin'." he took another big bite, taking another moment to melt over it. "I don't mind, I kinda hate being around them nowadays anyways." 

Thomas frowned deeply. "Why not just leave?" 

"And get killed by some other Cranks? No thanks. I'm gonna lose my mind and die anyway, might as well try and push on for as long as I can." he said, glancing at Thomas. "So you guys are Immune, huh?" 

"Yeah," Thomas said, glancing over at his camp. "All of us." 

Newt nodded a bit. "Must be nice," he muttered, and Thomas couldn't describe the punch to the gut he got when he looked at those sad eyes. 

He didn't know what to say, so he just stared down at the pathetic little stream. There was so little water that the flow of it almost got stopped over the rocks at the bottom, but managed to push on. Thomas stretched his leg out, putting his foot in the middle of the small stream of water, disrupting the flow. Newt watched him, amused. "Your shoe is going to be soaking wet," he remarked, watching the water collect against it like a dam. 

Thomas laughed, removing his foot, washing the pathetic stream look almost strong for once. 

They didn't talk much as they ate, but it was kind of nice. Thomas continually stole glances at Newt; he sat with his knees up and separated, his elbows propped on his knees as he ate, staring off. He looked really tired, and Thomas wondered how much sleep he got. If it was anything like how he ate, Thomas imagined he probably didn't want to know. But despite the look of exhaustion on his face, Thomas couldn't help but notice he was really...  _cute._

Newt glanced at him, making Thomas blush deeply and look away. 

Newt just grinned and placed his empty can down. "I should go," he said, standing. 

Thomas frowned and got to his feet. "You don't have to go yet, I don't mind staying out here with you..." 

Newt laughed a little. "That's sweet, Tommy. But I gotta get back before the majority of the others wake up. If they see what way I come from, then you'll be screwed. There's no tellin' what they'll do."  _His accent,_ Thomas thought,  _also cute._

Thomas rubbed the back of his head nervously. "Well... You could just come stay with us, ya know. I can get Minho to deal with it, and since we're all Immune it's not like--" 

"You know I can't do that," Newt said, still smiling. Again, it looked a bit apologetic. "Thank you. For the food, and the hospitality," he said, briefly motioning to their little spot. "I'm sorry that happened, again." he nodded at Thomas, looking a bit awkward and nervous now. "So... Yeah, I gotta go." 

Thomas frowned deeply. "Okay... I still think you should stay." 

"I bet you do," Newt said, almost affectionately, before turning and jogging off. 

Thomas stood there for awhile, watching him disappear.

After all that, and he was left with nothing but two empty cans of peaches. 


	3. An Awful Idea, Really

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies! 
> 
> Here's another update on this one! My other fics will be updated after I finish cleaning up around here and take a nice, warm shower! (It's getting cold here already, ah!) 
> 
> ***I do NOT own The Maze Runner series or any of the characters!***

"Thomas!" 

Thomas stirred, refusing to open his eyes. 

"Thomas, get up ya lazy lug," Chuck said, shoving Thomas' shoulder. 

Thomas groaned and finally opened his eyes, glaring. "What?" he snapped, rolling over. 

"Come on, it's almost noon. Minho told us what happened and I wanna talk to you about it!" Chuck persisted, not getting the hint. 

Thomas sighed, giving up. He knew Chuck, and he knew he wasn't going to be able to escape from him now. He sat up, rubbing his tired eyes. He thought of Newt; thought of the way he had left earlier that morning. Now that it was almost noon, Thomas was really beginning to wonder about him.  _Did he get caught?..._

"So it's true? You guys were really kidnapped by Cranks?" Chuck asked, sitting down beside Thomas, staring at him intently. 

"Yes," Thomas grumbled. 

"And some other Crank rescued you?" 

"Yes." 

Chuck laughed. "Man, he must've been the craziest one of 'em to do something like that." 

Thomas laughed a little. "I guess you're right." 

Chuck stared at him, eyes narrowed. "What's with the face?" 

Thomas rose an eyebrow. "What are you talking about?" 

Chuck nodded. "Oh, I see." 

"See what!?" Thomas demanded. 

"You miss the Crank," Chuck said simply. 

Thomas rolled his eyes. "His name is Newt." 

 _"Was,"_ Minho cut in from behind them, taking Thomas by surprise. "You're not seeing him again, he's long gone." 

Thomas blushed a little, but just shrugged. "I never said I wanted to!"  _But I do._

Even still, when Thomas had a moment to himself, he snuck off back to the little stream. He wouldn't admit the disappointment he felt when Newt wasn't there.  _Why would he come back anyway? He made it clear he was leaving..._

No matter how often Thomas told himself that, he checked there constantly, trying to be discreet. Minho would throw a fit if he knew Thomas was checking. 

Still, that didn't stop him from checking for the next three days. 

Each day, he found himself just standing there, alone. 

On the fourth day, he figured he was just wasting his time. He checked first thing in the morning, then the afternoon, before deciding he was being an idiot. Of course Newt was gone, there was no reason why he would be there. And there was no reason why Thomas should be hoping for anything else. 

Yet he betrayed himself, and checked one more time once night had fallen and everyone else had gone to sleep. 

At first he thought he was imagining it, but there was definitely someone there. 

Thomas made his way over, and it became apparent to him very soon it actually was Newt. Thomas smiled widely to himself, not able to wipe it off his face no matter how hard he tried. 

Newt was just sitting there, arms folded over his knees. He distractedly picked at grass occasionally until he heard Thomas coming. He swung around and looked a bit frightened, even after he realized it was Thomas, like he was worried about what Thomas would think of him being back. 

"It's alright," Thomas said carefully as he sat beside him. "I was hoping you'd come back."

Newt smiled, looking less tense. "Really? I thought you'd be mad." 

Thomas shook his head. "No way." he tried to think of something original or interesting to say, but being around Newt made him draw blanks. "Um. So how are you doing?"  _Smooth._

"I've been doing alright. I just..." he stared off at the sad little stream for a moment, looking a bit sad himself. "I don't know. I don't know why I came back here." 

"But you did," Thomas said, smiling. "And I'm glad you did." 

Even with just moonlight offering any sort of light, Thomas could see the slight blush on Newt's cheeks. Thomas stood. "Want me to go get you some food, are you hungry?" 

Newt looked a bit sheepish. "Well... I don't want you to think that's why I came back--" 

Thomas just laughed. "Oh shush, I'll be right back." 

Thomas practically sprinted back to his camp and right back out again once he had gotten their food, he didn't want to get back and find that Newt had left or something. Thankfully, though, when he made it back, Newt was just sitting there, waiting. 

They did as they had done last time, and ate in silence. 

When Newt shifted like he was about to speak, Thomas simply braced himself for the goodbye, reminding himself to keep the disappointment off his face. 

"Have you ever been in a train?" 

Thomas looked at him, baffled. "What?" 

"A train." Newt repeated. "Have you ever been in one?"

Thomas shook his head, unsure of where this conversation was going. Newt glanced towards Thomas' sleeping camp, then back at him. "Wanna go see one?" 

"Right now?" Thomas asked, feeling like a deer in headlights. "Like. Like right now?" 

Newt laughed and nodded. "Yes, like right now!"

Thomas couldn't deny the spark of something in his chest. It was terrifying and different, but it excited him. He decided he liked that. "Okay," he said through a laugh. "Let's go." 

 

They walked through the dead city together, the stars hanging above them seemed brighter than usual. 

For someone who apparently didn't get to go scavenging much, Newt seemed to know the city like the back of his hand. He weaved about the alleys and roads as if he had walked them a thousand times. 

Newt led them out to the more open parts of the city, where only a few broken down houses sat here and there, until they finally reached the railroad tracks. And just as he had said, a train that had long-since stopped moving sat just a couple dozen feet beyond them, resembling the carcass of some giant beast.

"Wow, there really is a train," Thomas said as they approached it. 

Newt grinned. "What? Did you think I was bringing you out here to murder you or something?" 

"It had briefly crossed my mind," Thomas replied with a laugh. 

"And yet you came anyway," Newt said with a shake of his head. "Idiot." 

Thomas took no offense, Newt had said it too fondly for him to feel anything other than honored. 

The train was long, several different cargo cars linked onto it. It was just like Thomas had seen in the movies, except a bit more rusted, and a lot more graffiti than Thomas had thought would be on these things. Newt crawled into one of the open cargo cars. "Come here," he said, disappearing inside. 

Thomas followed quickly, hopping inside. Newt was standing before one of the walls of the car. "Look." 

Thomas joined him, and smiled a little. People had carved their names into the rusted metal. There were some names that were all by themselves, but for the most part, the names were in clusters; sometimes in clusters of two, or four, of ten, varying on how many people were in that group. Newt stared at the names, an awe-struck look on his face. "It's cool to think how many people have come through here." it was a casual sentence, but it clearly meant much more to him than that.

Thomas just stared at Newt, his heart skipping a beat; he had never seen him look so amazed about something--never seen him look so alive and passionate about something before. And Thomas couldn't believe how beautiful he was. 

Thomas smiled warmly and pulled a pocket knife from his pocket, waving it around. "Wanna add our names?" 

Newt looked a bit wide-eyed, and then he smiled so warmly and excitedly, Thomas had to fight the urge to tell him how he absolutely stunning he was.  _Happiness is a good look on him,_ he thought.  _Or maybe passion. Or maybe it's just the life in his eyes in general._ Thomas stopped trying to figure it out, he'd be there forever if he did. 

Newt carved his name in first, then Thomas carved his right under Newt's. 

They stood there, admiring their handiwork for a moment, before Newt instructed him to follow again. 

They popped in and out of the open cargo cars, just exploring. There was something to see in each one; graffiti that was closer to art than vandalism, abandoned items like stuffed animals and books, messages carved into the walls. 

They stood there, examining them.  _"We'll be in the next city over, find us William."_ Those made Thomas sad, there were so many of them. And Thomas could only imagine how little of them probably actually found each other. There were many about people who had died;  _"She died peacefully,"_ or  _"In loving memory of..."_

While Thomas was feeling himself get sadder and sadder, noticing all the goodbyes and cries for help, Newt simply pointed to one, smiling. 

_"Now is the time to love somebody, you won't get another chance."_

Newt just smiled over at Thomas, and Thomas just smiled back at him, his heart beating much faster. And he was falling for him. Because who wouldn't fall for a person who found  _that_ message in the sea of goodbyes and misery? 

After they had seen everything, they started heading back, walking along the railroad ties. Thomas walked on the right one, Newt on the left. Both of them occasionally had to stop to regain their balance, giggling like idiots the entire time. Thomas had to admit, he was a little bitter that the one with the limp was better at it than he was. 

When they reached the end of the tracks, and stood just outside the city, Newt sighed. "I guess I should be going. You probably should too if you plan on getting any bloody sleep." 

Thomas' heart sank a little. He didn't want to leave, and he especially didn't want to have wait another three days to see Newt again, worrying he may never come back the entire time. Thomas glanced at him. "Come back."

Newt glanced at him, a bit surprised. 

"Tomorrow night, come back," Thomas said, a bit more confidently that time. "I don't care if we just sit around and do nothing, or go do something else in the city. Just come back." 

Newt smiled, laughing to himself. He shook his head. "Oh Tommy, that's an awful idea, really." 

"I know," Thomas said, a smile on his face. It was. Newt was going to lose his mind, and Thomas and his group would be leaving soon. "But I don't care," he said, looking at Newt. "Just come back." 

Newt looked a bit taken aback, but Newt swallowed everything that was holding him back, and just grinned a little. 

"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow."


	4. The Way Everything Breaks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies! 
> 
> Sorry for such a late update, I had all kinds of things going on today! I'm so tired, but I needed to update, so please do enjoy this short chapter!   
> ***I do NOT own The Maze Runner series or any of the characters!***

Two weeks had never felt shorter. 

Every night, around midnight, they met up. They ate together, occasionally in silence, but talking more and more each visit. Thomas had thought the silence was nice, but the pointless conversation topics they burned through were even better. 

Thomas had noticed recently that Newt seemed a bit sad, even before Newt said anything.  

"I don't know why I keep feelin' like this," Newt had said, but Thomas knew why. 

He was infected, it was starting to affect his mood. 

Thomas tried not to think about it too much. Newt still thought clearly, but Thomas had seen it before. In friends, neighbors, family. It happened so slow, then suddenly it would all break and wash Newt away. He would succumb, it was only a matter of time. 

Besides that, the other biggest problem Thomas had was convincing the others to stay for awhile. They had planned on moving their camp a week ago, but Thomas managed to convince them that there were just too many supplies in the city to pass up. Surprisingly, he was right--there were tons of stores and tons of supplies to be found. But it wouldn't last, and Minho was starting to get suspicious of Thomas' need to stay. 

Though he knew he couldn't just leave; not with Newt here. Not with how he cared about him. 

Sometimes they stayed there for hours and talked, and sometimes Newt weaved him through the city, showing him random places. Newt apparently snuck out quite often, but he still refused to leave that group. 

"So how much longer do you think I have left?" Newt asked suddenly as they were sitting their together, staring at their little stream. Its flow was getting slower and slower. 

Thomas frowned deeply. "Newt." 

Newt sighed. "Just wonderin'." 

"Plenty of time," Thomas answered, but of course, there was no way to be sure. "But it's gonna be even less if you keep thinking about things like that. You've gotta be positive. I want you to be around for as long as you can." 

Newt smiled over at him. "Oh yeah? What about your group? Don't you guys need to leave soon?" 

Thomas shrugged. "I can get them to stay longer." 

Newt hugged his knees to his chest. "You can leave, Tommy." he said lightly, glancing over at him. "You don't have to wait for me to be some raging lunatic. I'd understand. Your group is permanent, don't lose them. I'm temporary." 

Thomas frowned, his heart sinking.  _Is that what I'm doing? Am I just waiting, and then planning to take off?_ "Newt, I'm not going anywhere." 

Thomas could tell by the look on Newt's face that he didn't believe him, and Thomas wasn't sure if he believed himself either. 

Newt just smiled over at him. "I have a question for you." 

Thomas scooted a bit closer. "And what's that?" he asked with a smile. 

"Why is it that you're convincing them to stay longer to see me? Why is it you sacrifice sleep to come see me each night? Why go through all the trouble?" he asked with a grin. It was playful, but had a hint of knowingness in it.

That grin made Thomas' heart flutter. And that expectant look in his eyes; Thomas' heart sped up fast and showed no signs of slowing down. Before he even realized he was doing it, he was leaning in towards Newt. He hesitated, but Newt just leaned in as well, eyes falling shut. Thomas was sure his heart would burst through his chest, but he kissed him anyway. 

Whatever fear had been holding him back melted away with the heat of the kiss. He leaned in even more, placing a hand on Newt's leg, deepening the kiss. He felt Newt's thin fingers in his hair, pulling him in closer, and Thomas was happy to oblige. Everything else had become nothing more than a distant memory. The chilly air, the sadness sitting on Thomas' heart, the complications of this relationship, the impending end it would be doomed to meet--it all meant nothing anymore, not now. 

"What in the  _hell_ is going on here?!" 

Thomas snapped out of, yanking away from the kiss to see Minho standing there, looking between them with obvious rage and disgust. "I knew it!" Minho shouted, marching forward. "I knew you were still seeing him!" 

Thomas opened his mouth to protest, but Minho swiped down, grabbing Newt roughly by the shirt and yanking him to his feet. "Get out of here and don't come back!" Minho shouted in Newt's face. He shoved him back so hard that Newt stumbled right back to the ground. 

Thomas was on his feet in a second. He grabbed Minho's shoulders from behind and threw him to ground. Minho fell just right, landing in the little stream, which made Thomas internally wince; that was only going to make Minho a thousand times madder. 

And Thomas was right, Minho was fuming. Newt scrambled to his feet, looking at Thomas--he was tense, Thomas could see the muscles in his legs willing him to run. Thomas hated the thought of him leaving, but Newt was right--he needed to go. Thomas just nodded at him, and just like that, Newt took off. 

Minho stood before Thomas, his face beat red. "Thomas, what is wrong with you!?" he shouted. "You can't be with--" he cut himself short, grabbing at his own hair to control his rage. He took a deep breath, then looked at Thomas, speaking calmly now. "Look, Thomas, I don't know what sort of relationship you and this  _Crank_ have, but let me make something clear to you." 

He took a step forward, right in Thomas' face. "If I catch you with him again, I will kill him." and with that, he stormed right back to camp. 

Thomas just stood there, his chest heaving. 

A whirlwind of emotions tore through him; rage, confusion, misery--he couldn't pinpoint a single one. He wanted to shake Minho, wanted to scream in his face and make him realize Newt was different. But at the same time, he could see it from Minho's perspective. They had a big group, and they had survived this long by avoiding Cranks and moving forward. And all Minho saw was Thomas breaking that. 

Thomas stood there, he felt frozen. Going back to camp and trying to explain wouldn't work, Minho wouldn't listen. 

And Newt wasn't going to come back after that. 

He cast a longing glance at his camp, then turned away and started walking into the city. 

If Newt wouldn't come back, Thomas would go to him. 


	5. A Bloody Idiot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies! 
> 
> Definitely a late update, but we had some furniture delivered and had to rearrange everything! I got a cool new bed-frame with shelves and everything, and a matching nightstand, and it's all very cozy and wonderful <3 I'm a happy girl.   
> So here we go! The next update, so sorry to keep you waiting! 
> 
> ***I do NOT own the Maze Runner series or any of the characters!***

Thomas couldn't believe he was really going through with it. 

He briefly wondered about his group. Wondered about what they'd think about him; what kind of person they'd think he was. He wondered if they'd leave--would Minho really just leave? Would the others go with him if they knew Thomas was somewhere else? And if they did, what would Thomas do after Newt wasn't Newt anymore? Where would he go? 

They were all valuable questions, and deserved to be thought over, but Thomas ignored them. Which was stupid and dangerous, but if he wasn't stupid and dangerous for Newt, who would he be stupid and dangerous for? 

Thomas could safely say he didn't care what happened next, just so long as he got to see Newt. 

With this new confidence, his hesitant steps became much quicker. Then before he knew it, he was jogging. And then he was sprinting like a madman through a city he barely knew and didn't trust at all. 

When the used-to-be hotel came into sight, he didn't slow, only went faster. 

Until, of course, a blade whizzed right by his ear. A sharp yet small pain took him and he gently touched the new hair-thin cut on his cheek. Thomas looked at the blade stuck in the ground; something told him it wasn't meant to miss. 

"You've got some nerve." 

Thomas whirled around where the leader from before stalked toward him. But he didn't have any of his usual dangerous charm or upbeat tones; no, he was mad. And he was mad at Thomas. 

The leader came right at him, grabbing him by the front of the shirt roughly, yanking Thomas in closer. "What do you think this is, huh? Is this you coming back to rub it in our face that you got away? What, did you think we could talk?" he scoffed. "Oh no. I'm not holding you for ransom anymore, hermano. I'm going to gut you like a fish," he leaned in, hissing as he spoke. "And I'm going to let these Cranks eat whatever comes out." 

Thomas saw the rush of movement. Cranks from behind the leader, behind Thomas, all around him. They were encircling him. This was bad. This was really, really bad. 

Suddenly, the leader shoved Thomas back so hard he stumbled over his own feet, landing on his back. "But not before we beat you senseless." 

Thomas didn't have time do a thing; a sharp pain came from his back, making him crumple forward. Then another kick to the head, and Thomas could've sworn he heard a crunch. Then another right into his stomach, so hard it made bile burn up his throat. He was barely able to keep it in. Then his legs, his shoulders, his sides, his neck. The beating came raining down and Thomas couldn't even try to defend himself; couldn't even raise his arms over his face. 

"Enough." 

The leader walked forward, grabbing Thomas by the front of the shirt again, forcing him to his feet. Thomas stumbled, but managed to stand. He could taste blood, and lots of it. He was swallowing it, it was making him sick. Pain throbbed all over him, it was impossible for him to figure out the specifics. 

The leader glared him down. "If you don't regret coming here yet, you will." he said, drawing his fist back, hitting Thomas square in the jaw. 

Then another, his legs shook under him. 

Another. Stars flashed across his eyes. 

Another. Black had began to spread from the corner of his eyes, and his legs had given out. He would've been on the ground already if Jorge hadn't been holding him. He could hear the Cranks cheering and yelling, encouraging this man to kill him. Thomas couldn't believe it; he was going to die like this. 

"Stop it!" 

Then that familiar voice snapped him back to attention. The pain dulling just for a moment. 

Newt crashed into the leader, both of them hitting the ground hard. Instead of sticking around to see how he reacted, Newt scrambled to Thomas. "Oh my god," he muttered, grabbing Thomas' face. He glared. "What is wrong with you, you bloody idiot, why would you come back here?!" 

The leader had stood, and he was marching over, turning a jagged, dirty blade around in his hands. Thomas could see it in the man's eyes, he wanted blood. And he was looking right at Thomas. "This ends now." 

"No!" Newt screamed so loud, so shrill and panicked, it made Thomas' throat burn just hearing it. Newt stood before the leader, gripping the leader's shirt desperately, pushing him back. "Please!" he screamed again, and only then did the leader stop. "Jorge please!" Newt said, calming slightly. "Please don't!" 

Jorge looked between them, then at Newt questioningly. 

"I'll explain later," Newt pleaded. He grabbed at Jorge's shirt again like he was standing before some God. "Please, please," he begged, begging for Thomas' life with all he had. "We have to get him some help, please. Please, look at him, he's almost dead!" 

Jorge cut his gaze to Thomas for no more than half a second, then back at Newt. "I want an explanation later," he grumbled. "Take him to my room, I'll see what medical supplies we have." 

With the way Newt reacted, Thomas was actually surprised that Newt didn't drop to his knees and kiss the ground Jorge walked on. Instead, he swung around, and helped Thomas stand. He took Thomas' arm and put it around his shoulder, then began pulling him along to the hotel. Thomas half-walked, half-stumbled alongside Newt. 

"You're a bloody idiot, Tommy. Really, an  _idiot._ What were you thinking, you  _bloody idiot!"_ he yelled, but when Thomas looked at him, he was crying. 

Thomas offered a small smile, despite the pain it caused him. "Glad to see you too, Newt." 

Newt attempted to blink tears away, but they were already staining his face. He took a deep, shaking breath. "You scared me." he said weakly. "I thought he was going to kill you." 

"I'm sorry," Thomas said, the action making bloody saliva roll from his mouth.  _Yes, that's attractive,_ he thought sarcastically, wiping his mouth. His hand came back with more blood than Thomas had anticipated. 

"Don't talk." Newt said. 

So Thomas didn't. 

 

When he awoke, he was on a bed. 

Newt lay beside him, fully clothed all the way down to his boots, sleeping on top of the covers. Thomas was tucked under them, his shirt was gone. Cream covered his bruises. He gingerly touched his face, feeling bandages on his cheek and eyebrow and bridge of his nose. He ran his tongue along his lips; there was a split in his lip, and at some point, he had bitten his tongue. His mouth still tasted heavily like blood. 

Thomas looked over himself, wincing. He was absolutely covered in bruises, and he wondered how many were on his face. His head throbbed, but the pain had lessened so much compared to when it had happened. 

His eyes drifted back to where Newt was, asleep. Thomas looked over him and could only think of the way Newt had begged for Thomas' life; his heart twisted. He loved him. He really was in love with him. 

Gently, he ran a finger along the shell of Newt's ear, pushing back some of his hair and admired him. 

"So you're up." 

Thomas flinched and drew his hand away as if he had been caught doing something he shouldn't have. He looked to the doorway where Jorge stood, arms crossed. 

Thomas swallowed hard, his throat stung. "Thank you," he said, his voice raspy.

"Don't thank me. I was going to kill you." he said simply. "The only reason you're alive is because Newt begged me not to kill you. And I _still_ considered doing it." 

Thomas simply nodded. 

Jorge did as well. "I suggest waking him up." 

Thomas glanced at Newt, then back at Jorge. "Why?" 

"Because," Jorge said. "You think I'm a whack job? We've got some real loonies here, hermano. And they had wanted blood. They won't take kindly to you. I suggest keeping him around you at all times."

Thomas swallowed the fear. "Okay." 

And with that, Jorge just walked away. 

Thomas didn't want to, but he gently nudged Newt. Newt's eyes fluttered open, and he looked over his shoulder at Thomas. He shot up. "How do you feel?" 

Thomas laughed a little. "Like I just got beat up." 

Newt's eyes fell and he shook his head. "You're dumb, Tommy." 

"I came back for you," Thomas said, resting his hand on Newt's. "I couldn't just let you walk away like that, I..." he hesitated.  _I can't. I can't say it. I'm too much of coward to tell him I love him._

Newt just sighed heavily. He leaned over, resting his head against Thomas'. "You almost died." 

"For the chance of seeing you," Thomas said, smiling. "It was worth it." 

Newt just smiled a little. "A bloody idiot." 

 

The day was pretty uneventful. 

Newt and Thomas sat about, and once Thomas was feeling up for it, they went to Newt's room. They went out and sat on the fire escape, and Thomas savored the way the chill, night air felt. 

"We shouldn't have kept meetin' up," Newt muttered, hugging his knees to his chest. 

Thomas simply shook his head. "I'm glad we did." 

Newt scoffed, glancing over at him. "I'll lose my mind. You know that, don't you? You truly realize that I'm losing it now? It's not a thing I keep sayin' so I can be depressed for no reason, Tommy." he glared off. Even still, Thomas could only notice how beautifully the breeze rustled Newt's hair. "You won't be glad that we did when  _that_ happens. You'll resent me for coming back." his features softened. "I should've stayed away. I tried to, I really did." 

"But you couldn't," Thomas said, looking at him. He grabbed his chin, making him look at him. "I know. I understand," and with that, he kissed him softly. 

Despite all he had just said, Newt didn't pull away. He kissed him back, desperately, but he was holding back; he was being careful. Too careful. Thomas kissed him harder, and it hurt, but he didn't care.

So long as Newt was kissing him with all he had, Thomas would happily take the pain. 


	6. A First Time for Everything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here ya go lovelies!   
> I was attempting to do two updates of each story tonight, but I think I'm just gonna stick to one on this one. (It's pretty long).   
> Anyway, enjoy!! 
> 
> ***I do NOT own The Maze Runner series or any of the characters!***

When Thomas awoke the next morning, there was the briefest feeling of terror and confusion; waking up under a roof he didn't recognize, in a bed that wasn't his. 

But then the memories came flowing back to him, including a few sharp pains all over him. If nothing else, it reminded him of the beating he had taken. And who he had taken it for. He turned his head to where Newt slept beside him, softly, curled up under the covers. 

Thomas leaned over him, kissing the back of his ear. Newt hummed slightly as he stirred awake, blinking the sleep from his eyes and looking over his shoulder at Thomas. "Hey Tommy," he muttered sleepily. "Almost forgot you were here." 

"I almost did too," Thomas laughed. "It's kind of amazing, right?" 

Newt smiled, but it wasn't convincing. "It is." 

"What's wrong?" Thomas asked worriedly. "Something tells me you don't think it's so amazing." 

"I do, I do," Newt assured, sitting up. "I just think you're gonna wish you hadn't come here. It's literally a hotel full of Cranks." 

Thomas shook his head. "I know it's not gonna be easy. I don't expect it to be, but as long as I have you, I don't really care," he said with a smile, grabbing Newt's chin and making him look at him. "I came here for you, remember?" 

Newt smiled sheepishly, his cheeks pink. "Okay," he said, smiling at him. 

Thomas smiled back, kissing him briefly before a scream tore through the air. Thomas' eyes went wide and he gripped Newt's arm, looking about, panicked. He looked at Newt and was shocked to see him looking completely calm. Newt sighed, a small grin on his face.

"Oh Tommy. You're never gonna fit in here." 

 

It became apparent to Thomas very quickly that Newt was right.

Screams were common, as well as crazed laughter. There was one Crank in particular that really gave Thomas the creeps. He walked through every hall in the hotel constantly. Slow and stalking, barely a walk at all. Sometimes he and the Crank would make eye contact, and he just looked so broken down, way beyond repair. 

Thomas became hungry very quickly, and Newt insisted they go find something for him to eat. 

They walked down the dirty, broken steps together. Occasionally the dull aches through Thomas' body would send him off balance and he'd have to lean against Newt for support. When they reached what used to be the lobby, several Cranks that were lounging about turned to look at them. 

Jorge was one of them, sitting on a very sad remainder of a couch. "He lives." 

Several Cranks laughed. 

Thomas just nodded sheepishly. Jorge patted the couch beside him. "Come sit, let me check on you." 

Thomas nodded and walked over, sitting beside him. Newt hovered behind him, looking around warily. Thomas chose to ignore all the eyes on him. Jorge peeked and prodded at Thomas' injuries, assuring him he'd be fine. "It's gonna be sore for at least a couple days," he said, leaning back against the couch. "But they'll heal. I was sure you'd have a broken rib or too, but you don't seem to." 

Thomas was relieved to hear that; he moved about too often for that. 

 _Well, I did,_ he thought, something weighing on his chest.  _I'm not sure when I'll be traveling with that group again._ He looked about at his current group and shuddered. 

_How am I going to do this?_

Suddenly one of the Cranks sat right beside Thomas, a bit too close, leaning in close. "I bet your mind's completely clear." he said cheerfully. He didn't sound completely sinister and crazy, just off. 

"Yeah, it's pretty clear," Thomas responded carefully, offering a smile. 

The Crank accepted it excitedly, his own smile widening. "You're my best friend." he said, cutting a sideways glance to Newt, then back at Thomas. "Don't tell him. He'll be jealous." 

Thomas just laughed a little and nodded. "Okay, I won't." 

Of course Newt was standing right there, so he just watched, amused. 

Thomas cleared his throat. "So what's your name?" 

"Shh!" the Crank replied, putting a hand over Thomas' mouth. "You can't ask something like that," he muttered, clearly offended, pulling his hand away. 

Now he definitely seemed to be a lot more than just off. 

"Oh, sorry." Thomas said. "I won't do it again." 

"I forgive you." He replied with a nod. He peered around, then leaned in close. "Follow me." 

With that he stood and ran to the steps, pausing by them to wait for Thomas to follow. Thomas exchanged glances with Newt, who just stared worriedly towards the staircase. "He can't come!" the Crank said as if he had read their minds. 

Newt looked back at Thomas. "You have a pocket knife, right?" 

Thomas just nodded a little. "You think I should go?" 

Newt nodded a little. "He'll throw a fit if you don't. You go, I'll follow once you guys get ahead." 

Thomas simply nodded and headed that way. 

They walked in complete silence, and Thomas was too worried to break it. Luckily, he didn't have to. The Crank slipped into a room, which Thomas guessed was his, then closed the door behind Thomas. "I have something for you." 

"Oh yeah? What's that?" 

The Crank reached into a cut in the mattress and pulled out granola bars. Lots of them. Thomas' eyes widened. "Woah." 

The Crank nodded and shoved four in each pocket of Thomas' jacket. "Don't tell anyone," he said, sitting on the floor. "You can tell Newt, but no one else. Ever." 

Thomas just nodded, not sure what he was supposed to do. 

He took a step back, and the Crank didn't seem to mind, so Thomas walked out. He didn't have to back track long before running into Newt. Newt looked all over him worriedly. "Are you okay?" 

"Fine," Thomas said with a smile, pulling a granola bar from his pocket and handing it to Newt. "He gave me a bunch of granola bars." 

Newt looked just as baffled as Thomas had, then just laughed in disbelief. "What in the bloody hell?" 

"I don't know," Thomas replied, laughing himself. 

Instead of trying to figure it out, they rushed up the stairs back to Newt's room. 

 

"It's not that bad here." Thomas said as they sat on the fire escape. Sure, it was only mid day, but things had gone well so far. Woke up next to Newt, apparently made a new best friend, had food in his stomach. He felt alright.

"Tommy, I promise ya, it's not everyday one of the Cranks decides they're your best friend and feeds you," Newt said with a laugh, shaking his head. "Not at all."

Thomas nodded a bit. "How do you live here everyday?"

Newt sighed, looking thoughtful. "Well. I don't have a choice." 

Thomas frowned. "You could come back with me." 

Newt scoffed. "Oh yeah, sure. Your friend would shoot me. Not to mention, I'm not gonna hang around with you guys and then lose my mind and start stabbing people or somethin'." 

Thomas stared off. It really wasn't fair. "You're gonna miss out on so much, and that's really not fair."

Newt looked a bit surprised. "Well, yeah. But I mean, I got my first boyfriend, right?" he said, even though, he sounded unsure, as if he was asking rather than stating. 

Thomas smiled over at him. "Yes." he paused. "Wait, first? You've never dated anyone else?" 

Newt looked a bit embarrassed. "Well, no." 

Thomas was completely shocked by this; even Thomas had been with a Teresa and a couple others from their group. Nothing serious and nothing that lasted, but it was still something. Thomas gasped, looking at Newt. "Does that mean I was your first kiss!?" 

Newt blushed deeply, looking flustered. "So what!?"

Thomas wasn't sure why this shook him up so much, but he just couldn't wrap his mind around it. "Woah." was all he said. 

Newt punched him in the shoulder lightly, looking almost worried. "You're freaking me out, Tommy." 

Thomas laughed. "Sorry, I just... I don't know, that's really weird to me." 

"Take a look at my life," Newt said with a humorless laugh, motioning around. "What'd you expect?" 

Thomas nodded. "Good point," he muttered. 

Newt pulled his knees to his chest, still looking a bit flustered. "Have you ever...?" his voice trailed.

Thomas glanced at him, tilting his head slightly. "What?" 

"Ya know," Newt muttered, glancing away. 

Thomas' eyes widened. "Oh!" he laughed a bit awkwardly. "No, no I haven't." 

Newt glanced at him from the corner of his eye. "We could." 

Thomas nearly choked, looking at Newt wide-eyed. Newt just stared away, his face red. "Never mind," Newt blurted. 

Thomas' heart was racing, and he was at a complete loss of what to do. He stared off, trying to calm himself down, then glanced at Newt again. He swallowed something hard in his throat. "We could." 

Newt looked at him, his face red. He bit his lip briefly, then leaned forward and kissed Thomas nervously. 

The split on Thomas' lip flared with pain, but he ignored it. 

He had more important things on his mind. 

 

"We should probably go back downstairs before Cranks come up here investigatin'." Newt said, smiling fondly at Thomas. 

Thomas imagined he looked just as love-struck. The two of them were dressed again; sitting together on Newt's bed. They sat facing each other, just staring at each other for awhile, smiling like idiots. 

Thomas pouted slightly, tracing a finger along Newt's jaw. "I know." he said, glancing at him. "I just really don't want to." 

Newt nodded in understanding, resting his forehead against Thomas'. Thomas smiled, shutting his eyes and just enjoying Newt's presence for a moment. Somehow, after what they had just done, he felt even more attached to Newt. The words were on his tongue, he knew he should've told Newt he loved him, but he couldn't quite get them to come out yet. He was still terrified of how Newt would react, even if it was a stupid fear. 

"Today is one of the best I've had," Thomas said, opening his eyes to look at him. 

Newt shook his head, laughing a bit. "You know it won't stay that way." 

Thomas reached down, entwining his fingers in Newt's. "As long as you're here, it might."

Newt grinned. "Sappy," he whispered matter-of-factly. 

There was a gunshot, making them both jump. Thomas looked at him worriedly. "Is that normal?"

"No," Newt said, getting to his feet. He crept over to the door, opening it just a bit and peeking out. Newt opened the door all the way, looking around. "Not this floor," he said, almost too calmly, rushing towards the stairs. 

Thomas scrambled to his feet and rushed after Newt. They peeked into each floor carefully before looking around thoroughly. Thomas wasn't really sure why they were investigating, it seemed like they should be hiding. Judging by the lack of Cranks around, Thomas assumed that's what the others were doing. But of course, not Newt, he really was something special. 

They made it down several floors before they saw Jorge standing before one of the rooms, shaking his head in disapproval. 

Thomas recognized that room. He frowned deeply; it was his "best friend"s. 

"What happened?" Newt asked, rushing over. 

Jorge just crossed his arms and nodded towards the room. "One of the Cranks killed him for his food."

Thomas looked inside, shocked to see his body there; a terrible, bloody wound in his head. Thomas put his hand over his mouth, holding back the urge to throw up. Newt frowned sadly, glancing at Thomas. Newt glanced back at Jorge. "What about the guy who killed him?" 

"Justice was served," Jorge said, flicking his knife; droplets of blood splattered against the wall. 

Thomas stood there, his head spinning. 

He understood what Newt meant now. 

 

The rest of the day was pretty bad. 

Lots of fights, lots of pounding on walls right outside Newt's room, lots of yelling and commotion. The entire place was in somewhat of an uproar from the killing. "Happens every time," Newt said. 

Thomas frowned. "Do people die around here often?" 

Newt just nodded. 

Night had finally fallen, and several Cranks went straight to bed. Newt seemed to have other ideas. "Let's go for a walk," he said, sounding sad. 

Thomas was thrilled to get out of that place. Never had he felt so sick and terrified in his entire life. 

The moment they made it outside, Newt stopped. "Go home." 

Thomas hesitated, glancing at him. "What?" 

"Go home." Newt repeated, shaking his head. "I can tell you're miserable here. You don't fit in. You'll get yourself killed. Go home." 

Thomas shook his head. "No." he said firmly. "I'm not going to, I'm just not, okay? So don't keep trying--" 

"Thomas, go home!" Newt yelled. "I don't want to see you die in here!" 

"I won't!" Thomas shouted back. "And I won't leave you!" 

Newt's shoulders slumped, and he walked over to him, hugging him. Thomas just sighed a bit, hugging him back tightly. "I'm sorry I yelled at you," he said, kissing the top of his head. 

Much to Thomas' shock, Newt reached into Thomas' pocket and pulled out Thomas' pocket knife, switching the blade out. 

Thomas stood there, shocked, as Newt held a blade against Thomas' neck. Slowly, Thomas took a couple steps back, raising his hands up in surrender. When there was about an inch or two between him and the point of that blade, he stopped. "Newt..." 

Newt stared at him, unwavering. "I said get out and I bloody meant it." 

Thomas stood, his chest begin rise and fall harder as his breathing became labored, his heart racing, and his eyes stinging. "Newt, please..." 

"Go!" Newt screamed, taking a halting step forward. He stopped, getting control of himself. "Go." 

Thomas stared at him for a moment more, took a couple steps back, then turned and ran. 

His body screamed in protest, but he didn't slow, only went faster. He needed to get as far away from there as he could, as far away from Newt as he could. Thomas' heart hurt so deeply that he placed his hand to his chest, double-checking to make sure he hadn't been stabbed. He hadn't. 

But the thing that haunted him the most was the look in Newt's eyes. 

For the _first time_ since he had met him, his eyes were clouded with real, raw insanity. 


	7. A Crushing Weight, a Broken Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello lovelies!
> 
> Just watched Yuri on Ice, and it was amazing! Anyone ever watch it? Does anyone here even watch anime or am I just a super nerd...? XD   
> ANYWAY. I'm going to be posting two updates for each fic tonight as an apology for how late they've been lately! Life gets in the way!  
> Side Note: Yes, this chapter is very short, much shorter than the others. I did that on purpose, for reasons you will understand once you read this chapter <3   
> ***I do NOT own the Maze Runner series or any of the characters!***

Thomas stopped when his camp came into sight. Minho was going to be pissed. 

Regardless, he shuffled inside. His heart hurt worse than all his wounds and bruises, but the sadness seemed to be making those feel worse, too. His legs felt too heavy to move, but he forced himself to do so. There was a lump in his throat, choking him, stinging his eyes, encouraging him to break down and cry, but he didn't. Just worked on trying to swallow that lump, with no success. 

It was late, but Minho came running when he saw Thomas just a couple dozen feet from the camp. 

Minho stopped short of Thomas, looking over him in shock. "Oh my god, Thomas, what in the hell happened to you!?" 

Thomas just shook his head weakly. "Got beat up," he muttered. 

Minho closed the distance between them, pulling Thomas into his arms, hugging him strongly. It startled Thomas, but he hugged him back. Clung to him. How could someone be so strong when Thomas felt this weak? 

"You scared me," Minho said, squeezing him. "If you ever do that again, I'll kill you." he pulled away, hands on Thomas' shoulders. He frowned deeply. "What happened with the Crank you'd been seeing...? Did he help beat you up?" 

Thomas' heart spiked with anger when he referred to Newt as 'the Crank', but he just shook his head. "No," he said weakly. "He saved me. He begged for my life, and even still, he..." his voice wavered as he bit back the emotion rattling him. 

Minho searched Thomas' face. "What did the Crank do?" 

"His name is Newt!" Thomas shouted, then calmed, softening. "Sorry. But he... He told me to leave and go back where I belong. He put a knife to my throat..." finally, the tears collected too heavily for him to hold back anymore. He just hung his head and cried. 

Minho didn't move for a moment, probably completely shocked by the sudden show of tears, then he awkwardly pulled Thomas into another hug. "Thomas, Christ," he muttered, patting his back. "Come on, come eat and get to bed." 

Thomas sobbed into his hands as he let Minho lead him through camp. 

 

The next week was nothing more than a blur. 

Thomas laid about in his bed--his blankets on the ground, and three pillows--the entire time. Minho came by once a day with a can of food, seeing as Thomas wouldn't get up to feed himself. Chuck brought him water and sat and talked to him occasionally. Even Teresa tried to get him up, but he wouldn't. 

A couple times, Minho tried to mention moving camp. Thomas assured him he'd be ready soon, but Thomas didn't mean it. If they told him they were leaving, he'd follow, but he wouldn't tell them he was ready. All he wanted to do was lay in bed, sleep, and cry. And half the time, he couldn't even do that. 

He could feel the actual weight of the world crushing him with every breath, his blood felt too heavy going through his veins, he wanted to claw out of his own skin... 

Thomas had thought he had been depressed before, but he realized now he had no idea what he was talking about. 

 _This_ was depression, and Thomas didn't stand a chance against it. 

 


	8. A Tragic Love They Were Meant to Share

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***I do NOT own the Maze Runner series or any of the characters!***

Minho thought Thomas was being strong, because he hadn't gone to he and Newt's spot since he got back. 

He wasn't. 

Thomas always had his bed set up just right so he could see it. But he wasn't looking for Newt anymore, at least. He was looking for the memories; watching them form right before his eyes. He could see it clear as day; a Crank and a Munie, sitting before a dying stream, eating food from a can, and most of all, talking and laughing like the world around them wasn't in shambles, like their love wasn't forbidden and foolish. 

Thomas' heart constricted. He'd give anything to be back there. 

 _I want to feel it again,_ he thought, his eyes watering.  _I want to feel like everything is okay, I want to feel what it's like to ignore everything that's doomed to happen. I want to be back there again._

But despite his efforts, he couldn't. He couldn't will himself to be there again. Things had broken, and he had to deal with that. 

Just as he was about to doze off, hours after all the others had gone to bed, he noticed a blur of movement. 

And suddenly, he was alive again. It was the most shocking thing he had ever felt; to have empty lungs suddenly be breathed into again, to have a heart that had withered like a dying flower suddenly catch fire again. He scrambled to his hands and knees, his newly awoken heart racing. 

It was him. It was really him. 

Thomas jumped to his feet and began bounding towards their spot. 

It was stupid, but Thomas was smiling. 

He stopped the moment he saw Newt, though. 

Newt sat before the stream, hugging his knees to his chest, rocking lightly. It almost seemed normal if it weren't for the blood. On his hands, his arms, splattered across his face, clinging to his hair. Thomas slowed, walking behind him slowly. "Newt?" he asked carefully. 

Newt looked over his shoulder at him; eyes wide and feral. 

Thomas looked over him for a moment. It seemed that blood didn't belong to Newt. 

"Newt," he said again, walking closer. "What happened?"

Newt scrambled to his feet, running his hands through his hair. "I had to," he said, his eyes searching around madly for something. "I had to, you know I had to, right?" he asked, walking forward, gripping onto Thomas' shirt, peering up at him with sad eyes. "You know I had to?" 

"I do," Thomas said. He had no idea what he was talking about, but he knew what this was; Thomas felt like he was talking to the Crank that had given him the granola bars again. Except now it was Newt, and that broke Thomas' heart all over again. 

"I have something. I got something." Newt said, reaching behind him. From the waistband of his pants, he pulled out a gun. 

Thomas' eyes widened a little. "Newt," he said, shaking his head. "How did you get this?" 

Newt stared at the ground for a long time. "I had to, Tommy. You said you knew I had to." 

Thomas grabbed his arms. "Where'd you get that?!" 

"A couple near the railroad tracks," he muttered, glancing up at him slowly. "I needed it. I had to take it. But they wouldn't give it to me, but they wouldn't shoot me either. I had to kill 'em for it. You know I had to, don't you?" 

Horror washed over Thomas. He swallowed down the taste of fear in his mouth, trying to imagine Newt killing innocents. "I do," he said, weakly. 

Newt nodded and placed the gun in Thomas' hand. "And you know what you have to do, right?" 

Thomas shook his head. "What are you talking about?" 

Newt grabbed Thomas' wrist, leading Thomas' hand. He stopped when the gun was against Newt's head, and looked up at Thomas expectantly. Thomas quickly yanked his arm away, throwing the gun to the ground. "No," he said, shaking his head. Tears rolled down his face, his breath hitching. "I can't. Newt, I love you." 

Newt's eyes widened, and much to Thomas' relief, they cleared. Thomas instantly felt like he was with Newt again,  _his_ Newt. 

Newt's shoulders began shaking as he threw his hands over his face, sobbing into them. "Tommy," he cried into his hands. "I don't bloody know who I am anymore." 

Thomas pulled him in against him as Newt's little body racked with sobs. Newt looked up at him, eyes red and wet. The moonlight mocked Thomas; showing him the beauty on Newt's face, even when he looked so broken. "We were never meant to be together," Newt whispered, his lips quivering. 

"No." Thomas said, grabbing Newt's arms, his voice suddenly strong despite the tears rolling down his face. "We  _were_ meant to be together. We were meant to fall in love and then fall apart like this. It's not fair, but it's the love we got. We were meant to be together, even if it's like this." 

Newt laughed weakly; it was completely flat and humorless. It sounded like it hurt more than his sobbing. "Seems like fate's a cruel bastard." 

Thomas pulled a smile. It hurt. 

"No kidding." 

Newt's smile fell. He grabbed Thomas' face, looking over his face with such admiration that Thomas' heart skipped a beat; even now, being loved by Newt was enough to make his heart stutter. "Kill me." he whispered. "Kill me while my mind is clear. Kill me while I still love you."

Thomas began to sob harder than he ever had. Newt held his face as he did so, but that didn't stop him. His entire body racked with the sobs, and he couldn't see through the tears in his eyes. Gritting his teeth to fight the emotion, he blinked some of the tears from his vision. Practically whimpering, Thomas reached down to where he had discarded the gun on the ground. 

Slowly, he straightened back out and looked at Newt. 

His Newt. 

Beautiful and smart, unpredictable and passionate. All the things he fell in love were there, swimming in Newt's pained eyes. Thomas held back his emotion as he saw the emotion in Newt's. 

Even as he was about to die, there was more love in Newt's eyes than pain. 

And that was the very reason he loved this person so deeply. 

Marveling at his ability to love no matter what, Thomas wrapped an arm strongly around Newt's waist and pulled him against him. They stared into each other's eyes for a moment. There was pain and love and fear, but neither needed to speak. 

_I love you._

_I love you, too._

And with that, Thomas kissed him harder than he ever had. It hurt, but Thomas didn't care. He kissed him with everything he had, every emotion swirling through him. All the while, raising and pressing the gun against the side of Newt's head. 

And when he was sure his heart would burst, he pulled the trigger. 


	9. Now is the Time to Love Somebody, You Won't Get Another Chance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lovelies! 
> 
> I was only going to do two updates, but I figured since I knew this chapter would be short (since it's the last one), I might as well just add it on here!   
> ***I do NOT own the Maze Runner series or any of the characters!***

Thomas shrugged, the gun on his back weighing on him. 

Minho and Thomas stood, watching the group bustling about. Collecting all their things, cramming them into backpacks, double-checking that they had everything. Moving camps was always so chaotic. Especially now that winter was coming. 

Minho glanced at him. "Ready to move on?" 

Thomas nodded. "Sounds fun. Lots of walking and complaining, yay." 

Minho laughed. "It's not too bad. My personal favorite is the thousands of potty breaks." 

Thomas groaned just at the thought.

"Actually," he said after a moment. "I'll be right back." 

Minho just nodded. 

Thomas walked over to their spot. 

The stream was even slower. It had only been a week since Newt died, but winter was beginning to creep up. It seemed it got colder and colder each year, like maybe the world was recovering from the sun flares. 

Thomas stood before the large rock that he had used as a grave marker. Maybe it was cruel to bury Newt in their spot, but Thomas thought it was appropriate. It was the only way Thomas knew how to thank Newt for gracing his life, for making this spot mean something. His heart weighed down, constricting slightly. He knelt before the rock, gently pressing his hand against it. His first love. His last love. 

In an odd, twisted sort of way, Newt reminded Thomas that there was still good in the world, even if Newt hadn't lasted in it. 

But Newt had believed in love and passion, even knowing that he was sick, that he was doomed to lose himself. There was something about that that absolutely captivated Thomas' heart more than anything else. 

So Thomas smiled. 

He pulled a little plant with small, yellow flowers on the top out of the ground, and placed it before the grave. He had heard it was a weed and not a flower, but it'd do. 

_So long._

And with that, he stood, and walked back to Minho. 

Leaving behind a single flower and a rock with a sentence that Newt had once loved carved into it. 

_"Now is the time to love somebody, you won't get another chance."_

 

Thomas didn't regret a thing. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There it is! All done!   
> I hope you enjoyed! It hurt me to write, but I enjoyed it, haha!   
> Thank you for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos :) See ya in the next fic!


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